Sunday, October 16, 2011

occupy wall st. explained to the 1%, pts. 1 & 2

Part One: Blind Greed

Part Two: Ignorance

For an excellent 30-second explanation of Occupy Wall Street, check out Alan Grayson's appearance on Real Time with Bill Maher.  Thanks to Follower Jolie for the link.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

i came here to get away from you people!

Look: I just want to be left alone with my dog, my cat, my goldfish, my sarcastic parrot, the mice in my wall, the birds in the park, the short-order cook, the bank teller, the pharmacist, the guy at the lost-and-found window, my shitty mechanic, that sarcastic waiter who I'm pretty sure is actually my parrot, my worthless accountant, my equally worthless psychiatrist, my mailman, the occasional door-to-door salesman, my TV, and my talking toaster.  Life is pretty good since I "went out for a pack of smokes."  Tell your mom I burned up in space or something. 

Sunday, July 31, 2011

BEWARE: the door-to-door passer-by

Beware of this particular creature.  He is armed with two arms and considered dangerously annoying.  Whatever you do, DO NOT ENGAGE.  This is certain death.  In the event of a confrontation, nod your head constantly and back SLOWLY away.  If the predator continues to pester you, pretend to be asleep, or dead.  Even Ziggy doesn't need human companionship this badly.

Monday, May 30, 2011

specimen of the year

See what critics are saying:

"...creepy...and segmented...
...Kafkaesque...."  -Thorax Weekly

"Action, intrigue, antennae...this bug's got it all!" -BugMinit

"Six legs up...WAY up!"  -Entomological Society of America

" 'Die Hard' in a bug!"  -Jeffy
"I couldn't put it down!"  -Billy

Saturday, May 21, 2011

whoa, slow's not the end of the world

If you are reading this, Congratulations! You have survived the RAPTURE.  As predicted by Dolly (see previous post), it was a lot of baloney.  What I find most puzzling is that so many people donated money to the evangelical who made the doomsday prediction.  If the world is really ending, what purpose does it serve to donate money to anything?  Maybe it's like a pledge drive (the prediction was made through the guy's radio station), and if they reach a certain goal, the rapture will be avoided...for now.  Or maybe it's like the bank at the airport, but instead of changing your dollars into euros or whatever, your money is converted into Godbucks, or Rapture Cash or something, redeemable in the afterlife.  Because even though Heaven is perfect, it still requires a system of currency.  Honestly, I'd rather be left behind.

On a more secular note, FWIW, this marks our first-ever Sunday funnies caption switch.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

dolly on organized religion

this concludes dolly's week of questioning authority, waxing philosophical, and generally being a pain in the ass.  we'll pick it up next week and check back in with our regular cast of favorites.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

dolly on semantics

so you see?...technically, mommy's not a liar...she's just cheap and lazy.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Dad & Jeffy: SVU, part 2

The logical follow-up to the previous SVU post.  Or perhaps a prequel?  Not sure.

Friday, April 15, 2011

the "nervous briefcase" tax?

...or are you referring to the "traveling vibrator salesman" tax?

(I know I said I'd steer away from reruns, but in fairness, this is the first, and I couldn't resist running it on Tax Day.)

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Dad & Jeffy: SVU

As you can imagine, I had a helluva time settling on a title for this one.  I think "my morning pickle" was the top contender for awhile.  No matter what you call it, it's creepy.

are you there ziggy? it's me, family circus....

Sorry for the delay...I know it's been a long time since the last post.  My archive source has been cut short by the Syndicate, making frequent posts much more difficult.  I'm doing what I can to correct this without resorting to reruns (yet), or, worse,  mediocre posts.  We thank you for your patience, and realize that one month equals, like, twelve years in internet time.  In the meantime, perhaps the next few entries can win back your affection....

Thursday, March 17, 2011

i pooped in the tub!

happy st. pat's day!....a toast!: if this tub happens to you, may you take it like a jeffy, but get out in a jiffy.  slainte!

Monday, March 14, 2011

double switch: it doesn't hurt to ask

seriously, your haiku sucks

seriously, your entire physical being sucks a pacemaker...or a home run from a professional baseball player...or to be reincarnated as something less ziggy....

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

caption contest!

Every now and then, while researching a caption-switch (i.e., checking the comics page), the Ziggily Circus comes across a panel which, by itself, has so much switch potential that it boggles the mind.  And then Ziggy comes along and ruins everything.

We've decided to hold on to these panels-- minus the words, of course-- and pass them along to you, dear reader....YOU, in turn, are invited to provide new dialogue to the panel!  Send us your funny in the Comments section... We'll keep your submissions under wraps for an unspecified amount of time (a week, maybe?).  Then ONE submission will be chosen and pasted up in the ZC style, with runners-up listed beneath the post.

Might as well start with this one: 

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Sunday, January 30, 2011

puttin' off the Ritz

I'm also tired of cupboards.

(Side note: Today, the Circus gets a new look, in case you haven't noticed.  The new fonts offered by eBlogger inspired the makeover, and I think it has a nice feel.  I hope you don't hate it.  Wouldn't want to alienate all six of you.)

Saturday, January 1, 2011