If you are reading this, Congratulations! You have survived the RAPTURE. As predicted by Dolly (see previous post), it was a lot of baloney. What I find most puzzling is that so many people donated money to the evangelical who made the doomsday prediction. If the world is really ending, what purpose does it serve to donate money to anything? Maybe it's like a pledge drive (the prediction was made through the guy's radio station), and if they reach a certain goal, the rapture will be avoided...for now. Or maybe it's like the bank at the airport, but instead of changing your dollars into euros or whatever, your money is converted into Godbucks, or Rapture Cash or something, redeemable in the afterlife. Because even though Heaven is perfect, it still requires a system of currency. Honestly, I'd rather be left behind.
On a more secular note, FWIW, this marks our first-ever Sunday funnies caption switch.